postitioning the proposition

Just had a couple of brilliant days, yesterday i had a new group and the day before i had a new client and the same issue sprang up, how do we position our proposition, do we go in as the experts, or is it better to seek peoples input in a collobrative approach.

yesterday i positioned my work to a group better than i ever have before, it came naturally, however like baking the perfect loaf, i'm buggered if i can remember the exact ingredients, or the exact order, but i know it turned out superb

i think there were two key points

me being here does not mean there is something wrong with you
and
I'm not here to change or manipulate you, who you are, your personality, or your perceptions.

what i can do is help you to gain awareness, and maybe tweak one or two things, with your agreement, that will lead you to better results


sorry i'm scribbling here in a rush.....

Wiped

Another group gone home happy, either because they got something out of the programme or maybe just because they are gone home, but it's the end of another 5 day management development programme for this particular group. We got through a lot of work and i find i often feel a bit drained when the course is over.

i'm a person who usually has a good deal of energy, and it's never a problem when the group is there and i'm getting my energy from interacting with them, but always when they leave i get this sudden wipeout and feel totally zonked.

i wonder what it would take for me to be able to energise myself? is it as simple as getting up and doing something else? Do i actually need the zonked period to recover? or should i just ball in with another group as soon as humanly possible.

this year is the first year i can remember when i will be flat to the boards right up until Christmas, it's always been a busy time, but nothing like this, i'm wondering how i will handle it all, the problem is i am on the road and when i'm finished dealing with the people, there is just an empty room for the evening.

Maybe i should buy three brilliant boooks, two business and one fiction and try to read them in tamdem, the alternative is to call everyone i know in dublin and cork and arrange nights out, dinners etc, but i doubt that will increase my effectiveness for the work.

anyway, it will be an interesting time for me.... am looking forward to Christmas when i think about it, but in contrast to other years, i have hardly thought about it... in fact i was amazed in the Kilmore hotel in Cavan yesterday to be confronted with a huge Christmas tree inside the front door, i thought they had gone mad or something until i realised that it's only four weeks, anyway this is a lot better than whiling and wishing my life away.

strange week,

it's been a strange random kinda week, the highlight being Celtic beating United, the lowlight being the news that my friend has cancer, and 600 things in between.

I am having the website redesigned and refitted to have a blog there and so that's where most of my ramblings shall be in future, but i might keep the odd bit here for old times sake...

i complained about the heating in this office complex for 3 days in a row, and they have finally done something about it, the sonthing is to turn it up to full blast and leave it on all day.... slight overcompensation, can't decide if it's intentional or not... i asked a guy to redesign the website this week and (i won't name him) this is the response i got... i have read it 50 times and i still can't believe anyone in business would have an attitude like this... but let him off.... enjoy it

It's was entitled "reservations"

"Paul

I am just sending a brief message in reference to our telephone
conversation earlier today -

The reason for this message is because I wanted to explain my current
position in case it influences your decision to wait until February
for me to redesign your website.

I have taken a look over your website, skimming and reading the
content, and I am a little confused as to what it is about.

I am assuming that the content will be rewritten for the new site to
be more simple and accessible, as web users are skimmers themselves,
but I have a few reservations about taking on this sort of job so I
think you will have to sell it to me.

The irony of this is not lost on me.

As a rule I do not work on a job by job basis, but instead have a
limited client list. For me, as a designer, it is important for me to
be behind a product or service in order for me to do my job properly,
and with my current schedule I don't have time to do any less than 100%.

I hope that I am not coming across as rude, as I am quite no-nonsense
and straightforward, but at first sight Newton Performance Coaching
doesn't seem to fall into step with XXXXXXX, and I am not sure how
well that would work out.

If I have got the wrong impression and you would like to clarify
this, please do not hesitate to contact me, and I hope that my
frankness is received in the manner it is intended.

Regards
XXXXXXXXXX
Mixed Media Designer"

jaysus lads it's a wonderful wonderful world......

If i had one minute!

was wondering, if i had one minute to blog before the computer expired, this is real i have about 30 secs of battery life left, what would i write about, i'd write about the randomness of the world, while one friend has cancer, while i and the rest of us are fine, why chance plays such a vital role in our lives, and trying to examine what co-incidence means?

mostly i'd write neither about the fairness nor unfairness of the world, but the pure bloody ramdomness of it.

is there a future for compromise rules?

The masters games were played in a wonderful spirit, the over 40's of Ireland and the Australian over 35's served up two very enjoyable games and a brilliant experience for all involved.

The seniors was something totally different, something ugly that i've seen before and that is greatly admired in Irish (and Australian) society but which CANNOT possibly contribute to society in a positive way.

Sportspeople are now being motivated and coached to believing in themselves and thier causes to the entext that they no longer believe that the normal laws and mores of society apply to them. I've had many opportunities to personally observe the behaviour of elite athletes, and there is no doubt in my mind, that the word "special" often goes to thier head and can be grotesquely mis-interpreted to allow athletes to believe they are above the law.

While the violence at yesterdays game was not as outrageous as the press would apear to hysterically indicate, and certainly not as bad as two club GAA incidents that i have been part of, it still would appear that the reason ireland did not win is not that they were not prepared to win at all costs, it's just that they were not as good at "winning at all costs" as the Australians were.

The major point of all this is that we were always conditioned to believe that participation in sport was an excellent preperation for life and that it passed along values of fairness, competitiveness, courage and discipline. The descent from those olympian ideals has been stark, so to be an elite athlete nowadays often involves cheating, drugs, violence, singlemindedness and an obsession to win.... i'm not so sure anymore if sport offers a healthy route.

In the 19th and 20th centuries the Military was the place to prove your might, your prowess, your patriotism, the fact that this involved sacrifice, discipline and official hyprocisy that occassionally led to brutality, rape, and murder was overlooked for the cause. I have a feeling that todays elite sportspeople are being brainwashed in the same way and motivated to believe that the occassional bit of violence, roasting, cheating or thuggery is ok, after all, haven't they shown the sacrifice and discipline needed.

Unless they can control this game, they should stop the series, but society must further realise that it's not the game that's at fault here, it's the mentality that is being driven into young men and women. We don't need the compromise rules to show us that, all we have to do is see the Galway hurling final.

There is something rotten in the state of Denmark.

Takin a mark!

Totally enjoyed the 2 games so far against the Aussies, feels great to be out there playing, the only downside is the bloody shape some of these guys are in, usually i feel ok about the shape i'm in, could be a bit better, but then compared to my mates it's not bad, then I have to line out against some guys who are in feckin brilliant shape and i feel, there's only one word for this....FAT.

So between now and Christmas there is going to be a serious effort to shed the ned.... it's not the biggest ned in the world, but i'd feel a whole lot better if it dissapeared completely.

As for the games so far, Sat was great fun, really hard and tough, Monday night in Cavan was so wet and miserable, that it was hard to savour the experience sometime, still i got to play under superb lights, and i did score a neat goal to finish off the Aussie challenge, did the same Saturday, i may have a knack for getting my scores at the right time.

Busy at work today, have one of them days tomorrow where the day session is followed by an evening programme somewhere else, looking forward to it actually, being on my feet from 9.30 in the morning until 10 at night was once only a pipe dream, now it's a reality, i'm going to enjoy it.

Ok.... better get preparing....

Here we go!!!

Masters (over 40's) compromise rules 1st test

Ireland V Australia

Am looking forward to taking on the Aussies this weekend, and playing for Ireland, the last time i was picked on an Irish team was 1986 and it was in basketball, twenty years on and my life has changed a fair bit but i am really keen on this compromise game, it's very physical and hard to get use to, but i love the contact and the hard hits.

let the games begin.

How did i ever live without one!

Good lord....how did i ever live without a scanner, and how did the world ever cope with not having this photo... such a lovely boy.... the two auld fellas look very dodgy though!

Grappling!

There are some interesting views on the Monaghan crash and the future of road safety in Ireland over at http://www.sarahcarey.ie/ and also at http://www.twentymajor.blogspot.com/

The daft thing is that politicians seem to feel that the behaviour of young people is something that they can control, and then claim credit for, am i the only person in the country who is morbidly amused that the headline on friday "gardai crackdown on road users yeilding results" are invariably followed by saturdays headlines "4 dead in head on collision.

The politicians can at best provide regulation and enforcement to attempt to influence peoples behaviour and fair play to the people who came up with the irish road safety campaigns, it's brilliant and i would imagine has saved lives.

This reminds me of the zero tolerance regime which apparently reduced crime in NYC sucessfully in the late 80's, which the police and mayor claimed all the credit and political kudos for. Malcolm Gladwell in his book "Blink" makes a fairly convincing arguement that the major contributor to the fall in crime was the Roe V Wade (1972) judgement which made abortion legal and ensured that those who would have been the major perpetrators of such crime in the late 80's and early 90's were never born in the first place.

We should be looking to the ling term in our road safety strategy rather than trying to apply sensationalist bandaids everytime there is a particularly horrific tragedy. We need a cultural change, driver education would be a start, proper enforcement, like at the times when the accidents are actually happening as opposed to 7.30 in the morning would help, and proper infrastructure.

you can't control young people, the best you can hope for is to positively influence them, fear does not seem to be working as a deterrent, maybe we should try something else.

The Sunday Indo....

Yesterday the Sunday Independent snuck into my house, Maggie was on the flight into Sligo and they give them away free on the plane, it's been a while since I've seen this quality broadsheet, so I thought I'd have a look to see what quality stories and political insight would be available.

Well page one had a remarkable article of massive consequence by Brendan O'Connor on the life and times of Fr. Brian Darcy..... and a political campaign to end stamp duty...ok i thought...there must be little happening this weekend..so i turned to page three, which after all it is the key page on any broadsheet... wow.. lola cashman still has Bono's trousers... .. quick glance to page two... well would you look...four young men killed in monaghan...where will we hide that Aengus?....oh put it on page two...we have important stories about the lack of Brian D'Arcy's sex life and Bono's trousers for the main news pages... i really don't know what was in the rest of the paper, I have better things to do with me time (like wallpaper the garden fence)

I heard recently that Brendan O'Connor is being groomed as the new editor of the Indo... God help us!

I used to think it was a tabloid dressed up as a broadsheet, it's not, it's just mass market trash..... there's only one real use to which the Sunday Indo should be put, but i find the paper a bit hard and non absorbent!

Shit happens

I really think the world is going daft, there is a major scandal on now because the national childrens hospital did not have the right screening procedures for Hep C in the early 90's, now i can understand a scandal if they had actually caused infections, but the only thing wrong (15 years ago) was a screening procedure.

The child protection bill which is going through the house of commons at the moment requires screening and a licencing system for all those who come in contact with children, either professionally or in a voluntary capacity, in otherwords the Brits have now decided that all grown up's are potential peadophiles and that all children should be scared of them....

all this reminds me of the movie the village, where the elders whip up poisonous fear and hysteria in order to maintain political control and keep everyone in line, if things keep going like this people will be afraid to go out thier front doors, creativity and adventure will be stifled and we'll all be walking round like crash test dummies and behaving like happy little consumers, i'm fecking sick of it anyway.

It used to be almost funny, this stuff about bogey men and pookas, but if this bullshit continues there will be no children out to play anymore, nobody to give blood, nobody to coach the underage sports team, nobody to take a stand on anything....i'm bloody sick of this consistant bad news and scaremongering,,,feckin sick of it.. you'd never notice would ya.

I even have a great idea for reducing road deaths, ban cars.... why do we have to live in a bloody world where people can't realise that "shit happens"? that people will be killed on the roads, that children will die, that mistakes will occassionally be made, i'm all for standards me, but if the level of regulation is strangling the life out of the people, where do we stop, there would be no drunken fights at night if we just imposed a curfew! no accidents without cars.. and no sporting peados if we banned all juvenile sports... sounds like afganistan or disneyland

Stepping forward!

Is it possible to step forward without doubt? I'm heading into a new phase of the business and although i'm confident that i'm doing the right thing i'm also really nervous of myself, a big fear in my life is letting people down, or more accurately causing people to think or speak poorly of me, so with anything new comes the risk that occassionally i won't be able to keep my promises and people will think less of me.

The truth is that how this works out will be directly linked to the effort and work that goes into it, if we acknowledge that doubt, and tear in nonetheless, then i have a feeling that it will be better than fine, the challenge is not to let the doubts rule, to allow them to paralyse and frustrate our efforts.

It's a fairly simple business really, decide on the plan, generate and package the ideas, sell them regularly and establish good relationships, deliver the goods, keep at it..... it's no different really from selling soap, candles, saucepans or shovels.

A friend made me really smile last week when she told me her son has started first year in UCD and he's doing astrophysics, that is rocket science apparently, this should'nt be.

ya lose one, ya gain one

This is my new niece Grace, she's very nice in the way that babys are very nice, if you lined up 7 babies in an identity parade and asked me to pick the same one twice...i would have a one in seven chance of getting it right. they all kinda look the same to me, but it is strange and wierd to look at the very beginning of a life, so quickly after being there for the very end of another.

Life is precious, in our society we certainly think it is, i witnessed enough resources being used to try and keep my father alive and wondered about it, here was a man who lived a smashing life, was now 81 and in serious trouble, and yet the time, drugs and medical expertise invested in his last few days would probably have kept a bombay clinic serviing hundreds open for a week. we certainly cherish the old in western society, i'm not saying that we should'nt by the way, i'm only asking the question,

but back to grace, the changes she will witness, my dad saw the introduction of the motor car and electricity, i saw the introduction of the computer and satalite communications, my daughter was about for the internet and the mobile communication explosing, god only knows what grace will be about for, the cure to cancer?, a muslim v christian world war? we have no idea (except that Fine Gael won't be in Govt much).. but it's exciting and i hope she enjoys it greatly, i'm sure she will, she has great parents (despite the Elvis fixation..lol)

am in a pondery mood

Give me a lever long enough and I'll move the world.

I’m back at work, what someone called the return to normality, things will return to normal, but the normal I knew with my father will never return.

I have not had the opportunity to be on my own and reflect until today, and writing this is an attempt to deal with the numbness and lost feeling I have in the wake of his death, I’ve seen it hundreds of times in books and films, the bond between fathers and sons, the desire to make him proud, the closeness and distance that exists, the acceptance both have of each others achievements and weaknesses.

His passing was a unique experience for me, the sense of peace, the knowledge that he had lived a full and passionate life, the understanding that I had little left to share with him as he moved on, the simplicity of holding his hand and knowing that he was leaving us, not through his choice, but because of the natural movement of life and the passing of time which cannot ever be recovered no matter how we wish it.

If I had one more day with him I could not share anything else, we shared our lives with each other to a huge extent, he saw me at my strongest and proudest, he also experienced me weak and almost beaten, but we never gave in to it, we never let life with all it’s pain and hardships overcome us, we always drove on, usually with his encouragement and I’m still here, emboldened with the courage he vested in me to carry on, to move forward, to live a life that, I can look back on from deaths perspective and feel that I have given it my all, that I have given it my best.

“Straighten yourself up”, that’s what he always said to us, carry yourself well, and face the ball, face the world, take it on and be strong, be strong for those around you, and yet with that strength be gentle, the gentle that carries those who are not so strong safely, my father had a intense dislike of bullies, he lacked respect for those who used their advantages in life to hurt others, he always advised us to take them on, the bully is a coward he said, stand up to him and he will never best you, be strong. He was a giant of a man, all 6”8” of him and yet he was at his best with babies and toddlers, they adored him, his disarming way of showing them true gentleness and fun.

His stories are legendary, I have no intention of going back over them here, the happiest times of my childhood were when we were alone together, either at the bog, down the fields, at a match or driving to Donegal in the old peugeot, with the gear lever on the steering wheel, discussing that nights Eurovision and singing “what’s another year”. They are the times I look back fondly upon, I almost broke his heart with some of my behaviour, but he would always support me, always be there for me. He was my port of last resort, and he would bail me out, we got through those times and grew closer because of them, and when he died I knew I owed him nothing except to keep his values intact, to live a life that gave of my best, that left it out there on the field, a life that would allow me to live at peace with myself.

Everyone leaves a legacy, some people leave millions of pounds, some leave heartache and sorrow, my father left neither of those, he left something far more valuable, he left me the things he valued greatly, the virtue of strength, the importance of gentleness, the necessity for dignity, the power of passion. He used to instill in me that nothing was beyond me if I had the guts and sought the education to go for it, when I was little and out with him digging holes or drains occassionally we would come up against an unmovable rock, an impossible obstacle, and he would examine it, and dig around it and then ask for a crow bar, a few well placed stones, his incredible strenght and a few minutes later the massive rock would begin to shift, as he took it out of the ground he would always say. “give me a lever long enough and I’ll move the world” You did move it big man, you did.

JP Newton 1925 – 2006 RIP Ni bheidh a leitheid aris ann.

Business

Business is like riding a bicycle....if you stop peddling....you're gonna fall off.

Getting back in the swing!

Momentum is so important, especially for me, if i get a break away from things i find it hard to pick up again where i left off.

It's really important that i tear into the work for this spet, oct, now and dec...... there are changes in work that may require me to take on more staff..... there are some big contracts out there waiting to be won and delivered, there are a lot of good and positive things going on and there are a lot of distractions.

There's the football club championship, and all the work that's involved in that.
There's Roscommon being in the all ireland....and all the excitement that goes with that.
There's the champions league, and Celtics fantastic draw of exciting matches.

Without being fundamentalist about it, i have to handle all these things without letting them impinge on the important work i have to do.....i need dsicipline (not always my greatest quality) and it's going to require a big effort.... still i have lots of evidence to show me that i can achieve all of that...

sorry for rambling......it;'s time to get the head down!

A whole bloody month!

oh too long, far too long it's been since i last posted on here, actually i nearly had to figure out how to do it all over again, it's also been too long since i stood in celtic park, my self imposed exile has ended and i'm mad to get back there, looks like the hibs game in spetember, the huns game in october and perhaps the champions league might bring us to some sunny and exotic place as well, my preference right now would be croatia perhaps.

Reading fiction for the first time in about a year, the book seems to throw forward the idea that life and war is not about how much pain you can inflict, but how much you can endure, and of course it set me thinking that the only thing standing between us and whatever we desire in this life is fear, fear of the pain it will cause us to get whatever it is, and that once we decide to have what we want, we have only once question to answer.

Are we willing to endure what has to be endured in order to achieve it?

we know, or we can easily find out what must be done, once we have set our objectives, it does not take an awful lot to figure out the raod that must be traveled, if we want to lose weight we know it is going to take sacrifice and exercise, if we want to be a magician it will take learning and endless practice, if we want a new BMW you have to spend lesss or earn more, earning more will mean doing stuff you don't particularly like, or working harder, it's all pain, and we need to figure how much we can get used too, how much we can endure.

That's why we test and stretch ourselves, a life without any pain is a void, the sort of void that one finds when they are hign on heroin, when they blank the world out with alcohol, when they lie to themselves.


There is no such thing as a world without pain, it would be a non world, that does not mean that we should always welcome it, but we should surely respect it's good side, it makes us stronger, it forces us to learn, it's is not a one dimensional "bad" thing that needs to be relieved as soon as it starts, that would make us a world of spoilt brats who get everything we want to avoid the pain.

what am i really trying to say here, i think that i am saying that pain is neither a good or bad thing, it has two sides, and if we want to grow, if we want to sidestep the void, if we want to satisfy our yearning gnawing hunger, then we can only do it by having the courage to decide to face the pain, but to facing it knowing that we will come through it, that it will paly a valuable role in our lives and that if we want to grow,to become strong, wise, courageous, attractive human beings, the we have to take the hit, we have to endure the pain.... it's not our enemy, it's not our friend, but it is our ally, an ally that we should appreciate and respect.

Things we get used to!

I remember a time when i was delighted to just have a car, but today i got a service and had to drive in a small car, it was horrid and cramped and clunky, but years ago i would have been delighted with it.

My internet connection is really slow this evening, by slow i mean slower than "normal" but in reality it is still ten times faster than the dial up connection i had a year ago, so i've adjusted to a new "normal" and when i don't get that i feel frustrated.

I never had holidays years ago, now if i don't get a few breaks a year theres something wrong, another new normal.

it was announced yesterday that ireland is the second wealthiest nation per capita in the world, when i was growing up our cousins did not have an inside bathroom, now normal means jacuzzis and hottubs.

the problem with all this affluence is the feelings it caused whenever our new heightened expectations are not met, we seem to have more anger and frustration than ever, still we must try to keep a balance on it all.

I try to be grateful for the real things in my life, wonderful friends, healthy children, a good home, and lots and lots of laughter, i hope they never dissapear

Another character leaves the stage!!

Wanted to blog today in the hope that some of my inane ramblings will spark some inspiration and I can finally write that magazine article that i've been struggling with over the last 2 days, deadline is tomorrow so i better get a move on, i've even though of plagerising something although right now i'm thinking of the concept of "flow" or authentic happiness as the next step, i have already written 15 articles for this mag so i don't want to be repeating myself either, i think i'll do authentic happiness, i'm feeling really happy myself these days, i have appreciation, i feel i am doing work thats worthwhile, i'm definately putting something back, and i have a fairly positive view of myself and my world.

it's good!

My friend David died last night, i have been happy and sad all day, happy with the memories and sad that a young vibrant life should just dissapear like that, i met some friends for lunch and we laughed so much with stories and memories. I'm not sure people ever get to see or really believe the appreciation that other have for them, maybe we are as well off, we might get arrogant and conceited, but still every know and again we should be really let people know what they mean to us while they are around to hear it. It's the rare compliment that goes astray, even if it's shrugged off at the time, it will usually be remembered at some quiet moment when it will bring a quiet smile.

The session tomorrow night should be some fun, it will bring together a lot of the ludhers who have been on many trips.

World Cup

It's been really great fun so far, England are crap, Argentina are magical and the supporters are not half bad either, what more could you want.

Great Karoke party on Sat night with the best selection of songs i've ever seen, i gave them a green day trilogy, cathy and I did american idiot and holiday and i did minority on me own, such craic.

Sunday was the Rossies, brilliant first half, dire second half, but still not so long ago we were always dire in both halves, we had a good day out though, all those who were laughing at the raincoat and hat earlier were too bloody wet and grumpy after the game to comment.
the Ocean FM job is going really well, we are making great strides.

I had some real surprises today!