Thought I'd share some feelings!

not sure if I should put this up, because I know people may read too much into it, but it's simply a reply I made to a man called Alun Rees whom I've never met but does interest me because of his blog (linked above) and his emails last year. He commented on the Christmas message on my business website where I used this quote to wish my friends and occasional readers a happy (or Hoopy being a Celtic fan) Christmas, The quote i used is one of my favourites which I think may have been used first by William Arthur Ward in the 50's the quote is

“Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.”

The reply was

Hi Alun, the reason this quote is not attributed is because I'm not sure who wrote it originally either, it tends to be attributed to Denis Waitley or even Zig Ziglar, but understanding this business you will know that many "guru's" approach marketing and recognition like Tony Robbins did with Bandler's NLP by stealing someone else's work, changing a word or two and pretending that it's their own invention (a bit like the music business where they change one note and pretend the same).

My best understanding is that the concept was first quoted by William Arthur Ward in the 50's but where his inspiration came from I have no idea.

And thanks for reading, have a happy new year, oh and on the injury issue, all is back to normal now which is good, I'm trying to draw a line under it and move on... from a media perspective I have turned down many offers to do a story for a variety of reasons, one is that I really don't want the publicity or to make more money or kudos from one persons mistake (I'm pleased he was never caught, he did not intend to do any of the temporary damage that accrued), but more importantly being the media they would have to find a coat hanger for the lucky escape, they would be either the exceptional health service, the prayers that were said, or worst of all I would be eulogised as some kind of positive "hero" who had such a fighting and positive spirit that I overcame the adversity, In the past 2 years I have lost 3 good friends to illness, all of them got the finest medical care, all of them were strongly prayed for, and all of them were brilliant positive fighters who were convinced that they could "beat" their adversity, and all of them are now dead and gone, so it does bother me when people have to find and credit specific reasons for everything, so that someone can take the credit or the blame.

It's was more an interesting year than a challenging year, I survived because I was "lucky" it's like when you were young and building a house of cards in a room when someone opened the door, sometimes the whoosh would collapse everything and sometimes the top layer would fall but the structure would stay up, if it fell when we were eight we would blame either the person who opened the door, the cards we used or the way we sloppily built the house, if it stayed up we would credit the amazing aptitude we had for card building, the quality of the cards we used, or credit God for keeping our house safe. I'm still around and back to normal which I do appreciate, but my friends are dead and gone despite the fact that they were all great fighters, got brilliant care and had heaven stormed, the factor to credit is both subtle and largely uncontrollable, I was lucky and my card house stayed up, they were not lucky, their cardhouse fell, there is nothing to credit or blame except the uncontrollable factor called luck, and I know their families are all doing brilliant and I know they are all missed terribly, but the people who try to put their bad luck down to something they did wrong or the people who put my recovery down to something I or others did right do fluster me somewhat, luck, accidents, or lottery wins are not something we can simply change, it's a bit like the weather or even your height, it's there, it's real, you have two choices, do your best with it or whinge, complain and try to change it until you are blue in the face, trying to change your luck, influence the weather, get taller or smaller or trying to transform your personality is a bit like trying to teach a pig to sing, your wasting your time.

As for the benefits that people expect from a near death experience, there are none really, but I did get an underlining of some concepts that I largely believed anyway, the main two being the factors of appreciation and involvement, appreciating the people around you and their lives is very important to me, and I continue in that vein but I was surprised at the scale of it and the wave of reaction from those I spend time with in all aspects of life, I knew I always appreciated and cared very much about them, but was very pleased and encouraged to know that they also appreciated and cared about me!

I do feel that involvement is vital for me and will continue to do that in my life, society had become too individualistic and self centered, and I do hope that the sense of community involvement, volunteering and awareness that others are just as important will return over the next few years as a platform for individuals in Irish and world society.

I also hope that the individualistic guru's who believe that the credit for every advancement and improvement is totally for them will fade into the background and that we recover a society where the best for us all is more important than what's best for an individual or an individuals family.

Finally if I had to pick out a person who's values and strength I admire it would be Fr. Peter McVerry who for 35 years has been putting his own accomplishments in the background and focusing on the homeless and hopeless and working to bring them hope in the future by providing the basics of life and restoring some confidence in themselves.

Sorry for going on so long but felt it was good to tell you my thoughts on the topic, thanks for reading again, and enjoy every hour and day where you still have the chance to make a contribution to other people's lives.

Paul.

If you feel I should take this down please let me know!