Monday, January 30, 2006

There must be a place in the middle!



Had the most interesting weekend....read a lot, thought a lot, listened a lot (really like that Jose Gonzales album), even wrote a lot.

I am fascinated by belief and fundamentalism.... those who think they really know... the ones who really believe, i have learned to be very careful of these people, to question everything but not adopt questioning and second guessing as a lifestyle.

The book above is called SHAM, and it's an diatribe against the self help movement, but it's valuable as an alternative point of view.

It rails equally against the twin self help groups of victimisation and empowerment and examines the relationship and effect of both on individuals and modern society.

Victimisation is the "disease" mentality (typified by groups like alcoholics anonymous) of labelling things like alcoholism or obesity a "disease" which absolves the "sufferer" from either guilt or responsibility, talking about some "gene" which causes these things

Alternatively the empowerment movement (typified by the tony robbins of this world) leads people down the road of telling people they can do, be or have anything in the world they desire, which is not true either) He does make an interesting distinction between the concept of potential and reality...in other words you could (theoritically) become president of the united states... but we all know you won't. he says these guys sell potential as reality and that's why they are so addictive (it's a disease you know) and peddling hope is not that difficult to a world hungry for answers..

I enjoyed Roisin Ingle in the times on saturday.....and Chris barrows blog.... they are very open about how they are getting on..... maybe a bit too much but i like it....

there's a middle ground for everything..... between the stiff upper lip and the blubbering fool

between the niave glomp who accepts and believes everything and the hardened skeptic who believes nothing,

between all absolutes.... does this mean there is no absolute truth...... perhaps... does it mean that nothing matters.... no.... what does it mean then?

it means an enquiring mind is a good mind....but maybe we mix up enquiring with simply seeking to prove what we have already decided.

which puts us right back in the hamster wheel again.

I have real writing to do...hope it turns out better than this

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Can't speak.....



am in the middle of a most interesting experiment, was on my feet all day today, my throat is full of razor blades and it kills me to speak...thus i shall try to get through the next day while speaking a little as humanely possible. this will be interesting for me as i am one of the greatest yappers in history.

I realise that a big change in my life in the last few years has been around the areas of endurance, courage, stickability, persistance and not giving up so easy. it would have been possible to not work today, but self employment through a conbination of fear, ambition and nescessity forces me to stretch myself and be there on days when i don't feel like it... thus i had the experience of getting up with hangovers before christmas and having to work (as opposed to staying in bed) and this week i have had the experience of forcing myself to do my duty rather than taking the easy way out... it's a major change from ringing in sick and getting a cert.

however it is still hugely important to take care of myself and not to overdo it... (ah yeah..laugh away) so over the next day or two i am taking a vow of virtual silence and am going to rest up and catch up on some writing and tendersw and stuff i need to do.

Did you recognise Sharon?..... Jesus does she look good for her age

Paul.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

got there!






I was'nt brilliant, or inspired or amazing or stunning or anything like it, but i got there, I did'nt run away... stuck it out and eventually emerged out the other side
what are we goin to do today brain?


same thing we do everyday...... plan to take over the world.

Very Quickly



I only have 2 minutes, this is exactly what life feels like today.... I have to be on my feet in an hour to run a day long course in management skills and everything in life and work and my head feels all over the fucking place.

the thing about showbusiness though is that the "show must go on" and if this business is anything it's showbusiness, so i am going to get out there and burst through the day and put on a fantastic day for these people

later dudes

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

another new year

I have been a most reticent blogger for the last few weeks.... mainly due to a combination of business and apathy,
but i have many new years resolutions and this is one of them...to at least make an effort to write the diary, the online one a bit more regularly... it's bloody fascinating now for me to go back through the archive now ans see what was going on...for anyone else i imagine it would be a bit like gargling diesel but then this was for me in the first place.

Here are the resolutions, each one is run on a daily basis, i learned years ago never to say never and never to give up on or commit to anything forever.

I am keeping a journal every day.
I am going to the gym 3 or 4 times a week.
I am getting in 3 or 4 runs per week. We started at 20 mins... up to an half and hour now...watch out new york.
I have not smoked since the turn of the year.
Neither have i consumed that alcohol stuff.
I am working away..... and it's starting to fill up again rapidly.
I am keeping in better touch with my friends and being more assertive.

ah there's loads more....business is going to be mighty..... the house is a happy place... i'm in a good spot myself..... I am in love with the whole feckin thing.....what more do you want eh!

oh...and if i had to choose between you and Angelina Jolie....... i would choose you....and if you believe that you're a bigger feckin eejit than i ever thought before.

Sunday, January 01, 2006

Happy New Year!




It's been a bloody busy Christmas..... had a lot of fun.. but it was a bit frantic at times heading here and there, and i really don't relax well outside my own house.

read a bit, listened to a lot of music.... the green day DVD and CD was the soundtrack to my holiday... also really liked the magic numbers and KT Turnstall, the Kaiser Chiefs were a bit of a dissapointment.

so i plan to have a few lazy days now before beating back into things on Thursday.

I have a few new year resoolutions, the main one is to get fit for the hard training that will begin around the middle of february,
i also intend to double the turnover of the business again this year, have a few nice breaks, and be kinder to myself!

i want to be as close as i can be to the people who are most precious to me, and enjoy those who bring fun to my life

as Jim Morrisson would say..... let it roll baby roll!